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Monday Morning QB
By Christopher Kay
Monday, November 13th 2006
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Britney Spears must be waiting for the divorce to be finalized before contacting me. I’m cool with that. I’ve waited this long, what’s a little longer. Damnit though! I love her! I need her now! That was awkward. Speaking of K Fed, what was Ray Lewis talking about (regarding the whole Titans fiasco in the off-season of how they treated McNair badly) when he said racism could have been involved in the McNair affair? Is he retarded? Yes. Yes he is. That was a dumb question on my part. Sorry. His new name is Mongo and he belongs in a cage. And don’t you ever, EVER compare McNair to Brett Favre or Peyton Manning. That’s ludicrous. He’s no where near their level or ever was. Ray, your stupidity never ceases to amaze me. What do K Fed and Ray Lewis have in common? Nothing, but I didn’t have a segue… so… there you go. Enjoy. I like McNair and what the Titans did was wrong, but it had absolutely nothing to do with racism, that’s retarded… much like brother Bilo and Ray Lewis.
No Huddle
Eric Mangini beat Bill Belichick (the biggest ass in sports, maybe the world) and everything is right in the world again. Justice folks. That’s justice. Did you see Bill’s cold handshake afterwards? Beautiful how everyone will soon see him for the mean, cold hearted bastard he is. I hear he has a lot of feuds (Parcells, Vinatieri and Mangini to name a very few) and maybe this is because he’s the problem, and not all these other people. I look forward to the unmasking of the real Belichick when the wheels start to come off the Patriots winning ways. It’s beginning… and the sun is shining once again on all of us.
LaDainian Tomlinson vs. Ocho Cinco was amazing. Too bad McCree had to add a really cheap hit on TJ Housmanzadekjnvaoe, whatever, I know how to spell… I’m from here! Anyway, that marred an otherwise entertaining game. Chris Henry should have caught that pass in the end zone; I wanted to see a crucial two point convert attempt and overtime in this one. Damn you Henry. Damn you! Go back to jail!
So… who still thinks that the Falcons won out on the Vick for LaDainian draft day deal? If anyone still thinks that Vick is better to have (not even counting the way Brees has turned out being better than Vick straight up and he’s considered part of the deal), then they should be shot.
Is everyone still ready to declare Vick the NFL MVP as they were 2 weeks ago when he put together an unprecedented TWO straight good games? Anyone? That’s what I thought.
Brian Billick didn’t call an interception return for a touchdown in this one. What was he thinking?! It worked in the last two games. He was lucky to escape this game on a blocked FG try by the woeful Titans. Next time he should call another defensive TD. What an offensive guru, he rules…
Vince Young will never be consistent and good in this league. Sorry. Rose Bowl hype was for nothing. With good reason might I add. I saw it back then and I see it now… why can’t others see this?
The “champion” Steelers won against the defenseless Saints… but I’m sorry, still no playoffs for you!
Reggie Bush scores a TD but he’s done pretty much nothing all year I’m sorry to say. He’s being outplayed on his own team by another rookie, Colston. Bush had such a huge, HUGE hype leading up to his drafting. People were thinking he was the most exciting player to enter the league in decades. Morons. I feel these people didn’t watch college. He will never be able to run between the tackles. He had the biggest holes ever in college to run through at USC. He had talent, I won’t argue that… but he’s more of a Randal El kind of player better suited for a gimmick play here or there. He may give you a pretty play every 4 games, but not more.
Peyton Manning and the Colts wining close games is good for them. I smell Superbowl… and maybe a perfect season? I think it could happen. Winning the close ones is what gets it done.
The Seahawks will be in the playoffs for sure after their big win over the Rams, even though Wallace and Morris were leading the team. The Superbowl loser hasn’t made the playoffs the following year in recent history, but the Seahawks are going to make it and the Steelers aren’t. Just more proof that the Seahawks are the real champions and it was the refs that gave the crown to the undeserving Steelers.
The Bears shut up everyone. Why doesn’t anyone like to give them credit? They pointed back to a few years ago when they had a fluke season under Jauron… but this is the second straight year they’re doing good. Give them credit people! They’re the best team in the NFC followed by the Seahawks and Eagles… not the woeful Giants.
I’m sick of that Jump Shot the Giants do after every play. Thank god everyone is copying it and sticking it to them. Eli Manning… you still suck.
The Flex game on Sunday is the greatest idea in our modern world. Sliced bread ain’t got nothing on the Flex game. It has made Sunday nights great football watching. Monday Night Football is dead. The games suck and the whole product looks like a second tier program. That’s really too bad.
#2 Michigan Wolverines at #1 Ohio State Buckeyes. Wow. I just came.
Mail Bag
Empty. Like my soul. And soon to be like my bowels. I have to go to the bathroom.
Offensive Player of the Week: Ocho Cinco put on a Receivers clinic. All for nothing though in a loss the Bengals could ill afford.
Defensive Player of the Week: Someone played defense this week? I didn’t notice. Merriman usually plays good; maybe I should give it to him… Oh, steroids you say? Suspended? Never mind then. No one gets it.
Special Teams Player of the Week: Devin Hester for tying his teammate Nathan Vasher with his 108 yard return for the longest play in NFL history. I don’t know if he did it on purpose (the stall at the beginning), but it was a thing of beauty.
Joe Theismann Award of the Week: Matt Vasgersian and JC Pearson calling the Rams at Seahawks game. This is unfortunately the second time I’ve watched a game called by them and they were just as bad the second time around. So far the worst crew I’ve heard in football. It doesn’t seem like they’re watching the game at all. Midway through the game at 14-13 Rams, Matt had the nerve to call the game a shoot out. What?!?! I can only pray he was on crack at the moment he said that. And for the whole game for that matter.
Pet Peeve of the Week: The death of Monday Night Football. And they paid MORE than NBC? Wow. They got ripped off bad.
C Kay’s Top Ten
1. Indianapolis Colts
2. Chicago Bears
3. Denver Broncos
4. Seattle Seahawks
5. San Diego Chargers
6. Baltimore Ravens
7. Philadelphia Eagles
8. New England Patriots
9. New York Giants
10. New Orleans Saints
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